The Nike

It’s the part of IVF that everyone hopes they’ll never get to. The round which you know in your bones is going to be your last.  The one where you’ve been through so many iterations of yourself along the way you know there’s nothing and nobody left other than to turn up, check that bitterContinue reading “The Nike”

The Resolution

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house, Not a creature was stirring, not even the Tilderbeast dreaming of a mouse. The thoughts, the longing, the fifth Christmas without, The presents weren’t there It wasn’t what this festive season was about. Gratitude, worry and fear Apart from friends and family, with Covid tooContinue reading “The Resolution”

The Demon

“I just listened to your BLAW week post on Sophie Martin’s insta and I am weeping in the kitchen,” the text said. “I am just so proud of you for doing this. What you’ve been going through is a massive mountain of grief and uncertainty and I wish so much that I could take justContinue reading “The Demon”

Guest Vag #2

Welcome to the second in my Guest Vag series, where fellow women open up their hearts, vaginas, and share their Maybehood in the hope it helps yours. Bebs has written incredibly openly about her Maybehood, with an emotional honesty and humour that I’m sure many of you will resonate with (I certainly did). Over toContinue reading “Guest Vag #2”

The Bit

I’ve dicked about writing this post. It’s been bubbling – much like the ‘rona – in the background while I tossed and turned in my head whether, should I, how, if, when? In between work calls and kitchen table writing I spoke to my husband and asked him what he thought. It’s about a commonContinue reading “The Bit”

Guest Vag #1

Welcome to the first in my Guest Vag series, where fellow women open up their hearts, vaginas, and share their Maybehood in the hope it helps yours. Laura, a good friend of mine and IVF veteran, talks about her years in Maybehood, her thankfully positive outcome and the shit she rolled with along the way.Continue reading “Guest Vag #1”

The Tilderbeast

Somewhere between the veil of sleep and dreaming I was awake, a piercing sound came up the stairs. I was alone, with our second embryo safely tucked up in my HRT sponsored, 1000 thread count womb lining. Sleep was already fitful. Fuck, I thought. This is it. South East London and I’m finally about toContinue reading “The Tilderbeast”

The Pumbaa

It was the summer of 1994 and the gardeners were mowing the school sports field topless. “Let’s get down to some reproduction!” said our legendary biology teacher Mr S, steeling himself for the lessons ahead. Tasked with educating a rowdy bunch of 14 year old girls about sex – the poor bastard – this incredibleContinue reading “The Pumbaa”

The Arrested Development

There’s a spare room next door to our bedroom which has spent the last four and a half years moonlighting as a laundrette cum potensch nursery. It’s got the Victorian fireplace, neutral paint, obligatory laundry paraphernalia and faint hints of south east London’s finest coming from next door. The window looks out onto the sideContinue reading “The Arrested Development”

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